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God, Help Me to Grow Up in Christ! (Prayer Journal 165)

Father, in Jesus' name, there are too many moments in my live where I revert back to engaging with worldly entertainment and gorging myself with food and drink. How easily and quickly am I swayed away from You as I drift on the currents of worldliness and suck down the savory yet deadly lies of the evil one. I can start the day talking about and being blown away by Your faithfulness and generosity to me and end it by allowing worldly details to worry me.

God, at times it seems like I have fallen from great heights that I cannot see myself ever reaching again. I know that it is Your will for me to be conformed more and more into the image of Christ daily. Yet You are not going to force me to yield to Your Holy Spirit. You invite me to willingly submit to Your will and surrender to the Lordship of Jesus. It is true that You have begun a good work in me that You will fulfill on the day of Jesus Christ. But that happens as I work out my salvation with fear and trembling for it is You who works in me to will and to work for Your good pleasure.

There is absolutely no one like You, none that comes infinitely close. There is no one who has done for me what You have done for me. Yet sadly I keep spurning and denying You for people and things that are infinitely inferior to You and the salvation that You have provided for me. I so often do what I know that I should not and do not do that which I know that I should. So many of these things I do with premeditated intentions and motives. I have plenty of time to confess my sin and change course, knowing that I should, and yet refuse to do so. There is no wonder why I feel like I am dying in the desert, lost in the wilderness, and drowning in the depths of the sea.

Forgive me for doubting Your goodness and love for me. Forgive me for not trusting You. Forgive me for being passive in my spiritual leadership, love, and service to my family. Forgive me for being selfish rather than truly serving others. Forgive me for yielding to my fleshly desires rather than Your Holy Spirit. Forgive me for the profane things that I have watched and listened to. Forgive me for my gluttonous consumption of food and drink. Forgive me for being lazy and slothful. Forgive me for so often shrinking back in fear rather than living by faith. Forgive me for the times that I believe the lies of the enemy more than the truth of Your Word. Forgive me for desiring the world more than You, the lover of my soul. Forgive me for wanting You to use me more than I long to walk in intimate fellowship with You. Forgive me for wanting to quit when You have given me power to live for You.

God, too often do I go through the motions with no expectation of You doing anything. I talk about Your faithfulness and You fulfilling Your purpose, but I doubt it in my mind and heart. You deserve so much infinitely more than a wishy-washy, half-hearted servant who hides in the shadows and lives deceitfully. You see and know everything. Nothing is hidden from You. Yet I so often live as if my reputation among people is more important than the commendation of Jesus Christ. Forgive me for my hypocrisy and inauthenticity. Bring a godly sorrow to my soul over my sin, produce in me repentance, and lead me to salvation.

God, bring me to the absolute end of myself so that I may experience Your fullness in Jesus Christ by the Spirit. Cause me to be a man who lives in awe and reverence of You and trembles in Your holy presence. Make me a man who is desperately dependent on You who also has an unshakeable confidence in Christ. You have chosen me, called me, saved me, anointed me, and use me only because of Your amazing grace. There is nothing that I bring to the table that makes me worthy of a relationship with You or to be used by You. My only boast is in Jesus Christ and His cross. Father, help me to remain in Jesus as Your Word remains in me so that I may bear much fruit for Your glory. In Jesus' name, Amen!!!

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